Falling off the Wagon~So To Speak

Last week I wrote that I had a bit of a shopping meltdown-Post Christmas. I'm the first to admit, I'm feeling the stress of the Bankruptcy filing in many ways, (eat too much, drink too much when I'm lucky to get a bottle of wine, just obsess too much in general when I have too much time on my hands). I'm still waiting for the final discharge so I can plan the Post Bankruptcy part of my life with more finality.

I made the decision to go buy my new TV after the holidays-partly due to the generosity of friends and family who gave me gift cards and cash which covered about one half the cost of the TV. I decided to splurge and buy the new TV that I've been coveting and wanting.

In retrospect, how silly or stupid was it of me to go shopping the weekend AFTER Christmas and look for a new TV. Really stupid and silly. I had done my homework and had picked out the model I wanted. I then went to a total of 5 stores looking for said TV. I had even called a couple stores to check inventory and was told at my first two choices, the TV was in stock. All 5 stores were out of stock, a few tried to sell me an upgrade (at the upgrade price) and I politely declined saying I was on a budget and sticking to it. Nor was I going to purchase a unknown to me brand TV, a few places tried to sell me these unknown brands ( and when I did look them up on line, the reviews were terrible to lukewarm at best). Each time I declined, I got a look of confusion or something else. Folks, these flat screen TVs were THE item to purchase at the Holidays. And the model I wanted (and the back up model) were both out of stock. I don't have $700 to spend on a new TV, nor do I want to spend $700 on a new TV. I'm very satisfied with the budget I set and I intend to stick with it. I think most of the sales people were wondering why I did not buy the darn TV before the holidays.

Here is the problem. I also got a number of store specific gift cards as presents. I was getting more annoyed as I left each store (lack of availability, salespeople just out of high school trying to sell me a TV I did not want or could not afford and not hearing me say so), the post holiday shopping crowds. You know, everyone spending those gift cards and doing the return exchange routine. And truthfully, I hate shopping just to shop. I shop with a specific purpose in mind, get in the store, get out of the store.

I ended up taking my frustrations out on these gift cards, I started to buy things. Granted it was stuff I needed-new tea kettle, new cutting board, new robe, new slippers, new paring knife, etc. But I could have waited, instead, I sashayed into Bed, Bath and Beyond and Target and had a grand time shopping,using the gifts cards and cash as well. As well as I frittered away most of the cash I had taken out of my account for the TV (gas, two lunches out, small grocery shop, dog food, car wash, couple bottles of wine for hostess gifts for post Christmas, pre new years parties).

Yikes. Not a good way to start the New Year at all. I can only blame my lack of self control and allowing the stress of the Bankruptcy to get to me. And I have this feeling that will only be satiated with a new TV. Which will have to wait a few weeks until the stores are re-stocked with the brand I want at the price I have budgeted for. And until then, I will continue to watch TV on my small 13 inch screen with a lot of snow on the picture.