My neighbor is ready to kill her youngest daughter. Youngest child came home a few weeks ago and announced that she changed her mind, did not want to go out of state for college (after planning this for 2 years saying she wanted to beat feet from our small rural New England town) and now wants to stay local to be with her boyfriend who is going to a community college. Ah, guess what, neighbor has paid a ton of money in non refundable deposits to the out of state college. And youngest child has also not worked much if at all this summer and expects her parents to "fund" this new adventure-ie pay pocket money and her living expenses while she tries to get into the community college. Youngest child's grandmother gave her a pre-collegiate gift of $1,000 to use towards college expenses and youngest child now wants that money. My neighbor has told her that $1,000 is going toward the close to $3,500 in non-refunable expenses she has had to fork over for the school never to be attended. It's not going to youngest child. Grandmother agrees with the parent on this one too!
Needless to say, her parents are not going to fund this new adventure, youngest child is sulking almost as much as her older sister did in June and my neighbor is just out of her mind about this situation. Yikes, it's times like this I am so glad I don't have kids.
8 comments:
Boy, I hope she can stick with it. Youngest daughter may realize that funded college is far better than paying for it yourself and may change her mind, but mom has got to stick to her guns.
Holy cow. It's so hard for me to imagine the thought processes of these kids. It's so basically selfish, it drives me nuts to hear about friends' younger sibs ditching affordable choices and excellent colleges for community classes and boyfriends with no prospects. (No prospects applies both to the student and the boyfriends: neither kid earns any income, supports themselves, or has any career plans or goals.)
Best of luck to your neighbor and I hope she sticks to her guns. The entitlement these kids feel just astounds me.
I don't know the girl's background, but I generally support the idea of toing 2 years at community college if you're not either (a) qualified to attend the top 25 universities in the country, or (b) very focused and directed careerwise. If the girl doesn't have a ton of scholarship money to the out-of-state school, then this could work out way better for the parents (and the student) financially.
But the girl's reasons and attitude are just obnoxious. It's got to be GALLING to eat $3500 in deposit money for some dumb@ss boyfriend.
Don't let this be glad you don't have kids. If you had kids, you would have raised them better than this. I'm sorry, but this is in large part your neighbors' faults because they let their daughter get away with this stuff for so long.
I have no issue with a person going to a community college, I think they are a great local resource and more people on budgets should think about them as stepping stones to another academic institution. I have an issue with the way this child pouted for two years when her parents said going to school out of state would really stretch their budget and tried to encourage her to go to school in the state system or to a school closer to home. She really wanted it, they gave up a lot to make it work for her and now, poof, she just wants to stay at home and honestly does not care that her parents shelled out $3,500 of which only $750 is refundable as I found out last night. See todays post.
Sorry, to clarify: I don't have anything against CC, just that these kids who choose to are doing so after pitching hissy fits about wanting this or that fancy pants college across the country that costs 60K/year, putting their parents in a bind, and THEN ducking out to do the CC route. That's all.
Wow I hope the mom sticks to her guns about that $1000. She's starting to sound like a push-over, sadly. I hope not though.
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